Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Just another day

Why don't you help me in the kitchen? I have so many things to do.

I could just hear the usual faint cry from the kitchen.  After so many years of marriage, I was getting used to these little things.

Father, why don't you budge from that freakin' newspaper?

The second source of disturbance was from none other than my ever social Sahana.  She was busy too.  At least, it made me feel better that she was calling me as father, instead of various condensed versions of abominate equivalents.  They were fancy killers, really! I mean who would want to be called as papa or puppy (disgusting, who wants to be called like that!) or whatever.  By the way, getting back to the real reason of she being busy.

Sahana, don't shout at me like that.  I have a hundred reasons to be unhappy with you.  What are you doing in front of the laptop? Is this the reason you asked me to get you a Mac? Why can't you just communicate with your friends over phone? Or still better, why don't you go meet them?

Oh, com'on, this is the weekend.  I meet them all the time during the weekdays.

What do you intend to convey using those one liners?

Oh, that is Twitter.  I have 500 followers.

I don't care how many people follow my daughter.  I don't want you to be following any of them.  Do you understand?

Aiyyo, you know so little about the latest technology and you talk as though you know everything.

Stop your piffles, and get some work done.

I can as well go and help mother in the kitchen, and then, she added with a snicker, papa.


At the exact moment, the doorbell started to ring like a temple bell.  It is during these moments that you really want to disable this feature, banish civilization and meditate in the forests.  I also knew where the next source of noise had to come from.

Even before I could hear any, I preempted that step by raising my vocals, OK OK, I will go and open the door.  You don't have to shriek out from the kitchen.

Yeah right, as if I am doing everything here for my sake.  If I don't cook today, the whole house will starve.  Why don't you come to the kitchen for a few minutes? Then, you will know, how tough it really is to manage the house.  It is very easy to shout from there, sitting in front of the television and watching that loud mouthed journalist shout as though she is the one fighting for her life.

Oh come on, I haven't watched news channels in quite some time.  I just sit in front of the computer reading world news hoping for world peace, and of course, some peace at home.

OK, you are a Mahatma.  Now, please go and open the door.  You and your daily friend can discuss the usual politics.

Hello Vasudeven, Vango vango (Come Come! even though it rhymes with mango, v-a-n is spoken out as v-a-a-n in a pleasant sort of way and exactly opposite to Rajini's legendary ulle po dialogue).

Hello Raghavan, how are you? Did you see the latest news? People are fighting for a split in this state as well.

Ha ha ha, sir, if we split further, we will fall into Sri Lanka.  As such there are 77 states in the country.  How many more can this country handle?  Are there any more new states added today?

No, no, I think we are up to date with the latest.  In the North, Mayapur was added.  You must know who is in control of that state just by the name itself.  The state has added a new ministry as well - Ministry of Sculptures.  It is a ten man army managing the sculpture of one person.  Very commendable! Of course, there was also an addition of a separate state for film personalities.  Forgot the name.  Sounded something like Blo-oo-per.  As such they are a bunch of jokers.  Those days, the states were based on linguistics.  Now, we see new states based on fraternities, occupation, unemployment, hunger and a whole lot of other statistics.  Great!

How can we not talk about his, Vasudevan! At least, amidst all the bad things happening to the country, the only good piece of news is also in the form of bad news.  The infernal goda has passed away.  I think the 20 km expressway will be completed finally.  

Anyway, forget about the country  This is never ending news.  What is happening with your son? How is he preparing for the exams? Oooh, as they say, the tenth exams are crucial sir! If he scores well, only then will he be able to get a good government or bank job, otherwise he will end up being engineers like us.  Ask him to study well.

Yes, yes, I have told him that.  Otherwise, he has to worry about the endless layoffs and also, that bugger will end up becoming a debugger all his life.  Nowadays, he talks a lot about farms and fields.  I am worried.

Oh, I know.  I saw his farmville scores on facebook.  He is a genius, shouted Sahana from inside.

Ignore her Vasudevan.  Always butting her nose in front of elders!

OK, Raghavan.  I have to go now.  If I sit here a bit longer, I will have to see my wife waiting for me outside the house, and that's not a very pleasant sight!  Yes, one more thing.  I will not be in town for a week starting tomorrow.  I am going to Karunacherry for an off shore assignment.  I have to check my tickets again.  With all these new states, it is too confusing!

Raghavan, shouted out a voice from inside.  Now, you get going to the market.


  1. hahaha....ask him to study well and get a good government job otherwise he will end up as engineers like us

  2. good one dude. debugger!


  3. Funny! Nicely written!


  4. Awesome!! Haven't read (& laughed) so much in a long time. My favorite pick ...
    "...the tenth exams are crucial sir! If he scores well, only then will he be able to get a good government or bank job, otherwise he will end up being engineers like us."

    I was reading up about Nag brothers and landed in your blog. Now I've a full time job -- catching up with your blog. :)

    I'm forwarding your blog to a bunch of people. Yaam petra inbam vyyagamum perattum. :)

  5. Lakshmi,
    Thanks for the kind words. Hoping to see you more often here at my blog :-)

  6. Haven't read such an amusing one in a long while.