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Showing posts from April, 2018

We Knew

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It was our three-month ultrasound. We thought it would be like the movies, where you look at an ultra hi-def screen and the baby is crystal clear. It felt like a big moment. I had left work early that afternoon and was hoping to get back quickly. After all, it was just a routine visit, or so I thought. We checked in and were shown into the examination room. The nurse asked Hema to lie down on the bed. She applied gel and began moving the probe across her abdomen, looking for a heartbeat. Her reaction made us realize something was wrong. Hema and I looked at each other. The nurse didn't say anything. She simply said she would be back in a minute. We knew. The doctor came in, repeated the scan, and after a few moments told us that he was unable to detect a heartbeat. It was one of the lowest points of our lives. Three months in, we had already started imagining birthdays, schools, and family vacations. When you experience a miscarriage, it feels as ...

Visualizing the moment

The days fly by so fast these days that it's so hard to keep track of them.  Every other day is more or less the same, and the differentiating factors are governed usually by the daily monotonies.  "Oh, it's a Tuesday.  I have to take my son to the swimming class." Every day has a set routine.  Monday to Friday is fast, and the weekends go by faster.  Our days are dictated by our kids.  One of them is shouting and the other is running around.  Or, it's both shouting and both running.  Let's make it even better.  It's the four of us shouting and running around.   My wife and I would literally be at our wits end.  It's not easy managing two kids.    Friday was a slow day.  Mom was late from work.  Dad was busy playing with the kids in the backyard.  After finishing our dinner, we were just hanging around.  I was sitting on the couch with my laptop.  Akhil came and sat next to me.   "Appa...